Alone.

When I turned 19 last month, you could say I got kindda depressed.

Not that depressed, but you get the idea. 

"Why? You're just 19! not 91!" 

You see... I am all alone. 

19 and single still. I am totally rocking my teenage years! 

I was scrolling along my facebook timeline and I will see stuffs like, "I am engaged!" or "In a relationship" or "Happy anniversary!" 

It's just so fucking depressing that it's not even funny any more! 

Sure, I have met guys. Both online and in RL, but I get friendzoned from the start. So what's the point really? I am not picky, but others are apparently. 

I am fat, but I am not fugly. I have seen fugly people with bfs anyway! What sorcery is this?!

When I started polytechnic, I started being aware of how I dress, how I present myself and try to look my best...but you know what? 

People still judge you anyway. 

So... 

Do your worse, people. 

T-shirts and jeans. Fuck yea. 

So to say, That basically screams "FOREVER ALONE" to me but whatever. I go to school to study, not find a bf. 

Or so I keep telling myself.

It doesn't really matter when I am with constant company of others, but when holiday starts (like me currently),  I start feeling so... lonely. 

/inserts 2NE1's Lonely chorus here/ 

People keep saying 'the right person will come along soon' but really, I keep wondering where the fuck on earth are you? Are you even alive? Or are you in a coma or something? Give me a sign! How long should I wait? 

 I know other people (of the same species as me) that are facing this... situation too. I get it, I am young but you see... What if it still drags on for the next 5 years? 

and let's just say... I have my own regrets too. 

"Oh, but I'm scared to death

That there may not be another one like this
And I confess that I'm only holding on by a thin thin thread
I'm kicking the curb cause you never heard
The words that you needed so bad

And I'm kicking the dirt cause I never gave you

The things that you needed to have
I'm so sad, " 

Maroon 5 - Sad